I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I deserve this hangover.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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