did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
I hope mine doesn't look like that
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
