There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Randomize
