so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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