There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
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