I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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