I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
