There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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