It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
