I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
drinking out of a sandbucket again
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
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