I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
