i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
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