Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Randomize
