Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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