The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
