she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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