no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
