Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
This baby is an asshole
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
