If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Randomize
