im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
The best revenge is premature balding
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
