What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Randomize
