Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
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