When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
