He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Randomize
