You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
