i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
