Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Randomize
