what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Less talking, more tequila
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize