I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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