Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Randomize
