you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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