We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Randomize
