he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Randomize