God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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