Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
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