I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize