Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I will pee on everything he values.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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