Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
