Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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