My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
tell me about the fingering
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