did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
