big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
