dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I love having hate sex.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
