You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Randomize