U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
wow bdsm is so cute
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