I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
