you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
