Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Randomize
