I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Randomize
