i don't like sucking hair
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Randomize
