hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
